The story would be completely different. Instead of exemplifying love and forgiveness, the story would exemplify fear and rejection. Instead of returning home amidst celebration and grace, the prodigal probably would have turned back around, carrying away more shame and regret than he had arrived with.

Joiner’s question challenged me to examine my own life and ministry. When prodigals meet me or come to our ministry, are they meeting the loving father or the judging brother?

I know that I have experienced grace, but is my life a conduit for that same grace to others?

I know that I have been accepted into the family of God, but is our ministry accepting of any and all?

Does my life make prodigals want to celebrate or walk away in shame?

I haven’t fully thought through what this means for my life and ministry. At this point, however, I know that I don’t want to be the older brother. I want my life to lead to celebrations of grace not walks of shame.

Who in your life, because of their acceptance and love, has caused a celebration grace?

When that happens, when I miss the mark and I offend a student, I need to practice the skill of apologizing. I hope to hurt or offend students as little as possible, but when I do, I have to be willing to apologize. If the students can’t see me, their pastor, making every attempt to reconcile a broken relationship, then I’m not much of a leader. This goes beyond simply practicing what I preach; this involves not only leading when I’m right, but leading when I know I’m wrong. And very often, leading when I’m wrong, involves admitting when I’m wrong and apologizing.

How does apologizing impact your leadership?

I went to a lab titled “Off the Blogs – Into the World,” which focused on allowing what happens within virtual conversations to positively impact the actual world. The speakers at the lab were Anne Jackson, Carlos Whitaker and Jon Acuff. Jon Acuff writes the blog Stuff Christians Like and is someone who I admire; I like his writing and how he created a platform for himself. Acuff shared a little of his story and how the rise in popularity of his blog pushed him one night to ask God for fame. Acuff felt that God responded by telling him that he was already famous; the God of the universe knows Acuff’s name so what other notoriety does he need?

I know that this blog isn’t going to make me famous; it’s really more about the exercise and personal practice. That doesn’t mean, though, that I don’t want to be famous; I would love for people to know my name and desire to hear my thoughts and ideas. But God already knows my name.

God has known me since before I was born.

God has known me since before I wrote my first blog.

God has known me since before I posted my first podcast.

God already knows me and that should be enough. God already knows me and loves me; he’s passionate about me and is waiting for me to turn my thoughts and focus to him. Why should I care if thousands want to listen to me talk if the creator of the universe is just waiting for me to talk to him?

I don’t need to chase after fame; I need to chase after the Famous One.

How do you respond knowing that God thinks you’re famous?

First Date
In ancient history when I used to buy physical albums, I loved the sensation of opening the new CD as I walked out of Best Buy to my truck. There was so much excitement as I readied myself for my first date with this new album. Would I like it? Would it sound good in my manufacturer’s sound system? There is a certain anticipation when listening to a new album, whether it’s by an artist you love or someone you’re just checking out. We want to know whether or not the $10 we just invested will be worth it, if it will lead to something more. Just like, when sitting across from our date at The Cheesecake Factory, we wonder if the investment of time, money and energy is going to amount to anything.

Second Date
I contend that the second date is harder to get than the first date. Most people will say “yes” to one date because the possibilities are endless, there’s no telling what could happen. But after one date, after we see the way they twirl spaghetti or how they can’t stop talking about their collection of fur balls from their eight cats, we’re less inclined to invest time in a second date. After listening to an album for the first time, the excitement has worn off and we have to decide whether or not we’re willing to invest another hour of our time into the album. My iTunes is littered with plenty of albums that got a first date but couldn’t make it to the second date. I would like to let those albums down easy, tell them that it’s not them ,that it’s me, but that would be lying.

It’s them because they weren’t as good as I thought they would be.

It’s them because there weren’t enough catchy singles to hold my attention between the moody ballads.

It’s them because they’re not Lady GaGa.

In a Relationship
I have only been in two relationships in my life and there’s nothing better than seeing that little heart in my Facebook status that says “Scott Higa went from being single to being in a relationship.” While I am a firm believer in monogamy when it comes to my relational life, I am a polygamist when it comes to my musical life. If an album survives the awkwardness of the first few dates, I like to think that we’re now in a relationship. That doesn’t mean I’ll listen to the album every day, but I’ll come back to back to it again and again, like Bernard Slade’s play Same Time Next Year. Some of my longest relationships have been with U2’s Joshua Tree, Norah Jones’ Come Away with Me and MJ’s Thriller.

I love having a relationship with new music, but only time can tell how that relationship will end up. Will the initial excitement and sizzle lead to something more substantial, a comfortable pattern of lifelong partnership? Or will it just be a summer fling, something we look back on fondly as a symbol of our reckless youth? Who knows, but at least we have a lot of time and music to figure it out.

How do you incorporate new music into your listening habits?

I’ve heard terrible covers of Peter Gabriel’s “In Your Eyes,” Collective Soul’s “Shine,” and U2’s “Beautiful Day.” I understand that covers are part of the music industry, plenty of bands or artists will cover a song and release it on an EP or as part of a live album. I just don’t understand why Christian radio stations will play covers of songs they wouldn’t normally play. If U2’s version of “Beautiful Day” isn’t Christian enough, then why is a subpar cover?

While I may not be a huge fan of Christian covers, that doesn’t keep me from recognizing secular songs that are ripe for a working over by the Christian music industry. One such song is Orianthi’s “According to you.” Here are the lyrics to the first verse and chorus.

According to you
I’m stupid, I’m useless,
I can’t do anything right.

According to you
I’m difficult, hard to please,
Forever changing my mind.

I’m a mess in a dress,
Can’t show up on time,
Even if it would save my life.
According to you. According to you.

But according to him
I’m beautiful, incredible,
He can’t get me out of his head.
According to him
I’m funny, irresistible,
Everything he ever wanted.

If there was ever a song that was crying out to be covered for Christian radio, it is this song. It carries a good Christian message that, regardless of what others think about us, we have value to God. It may be a bit of a stretch to think that God thinks I’m funny or that I’m everything he ever wanted, but it’s probably still positive enough to sneak onto Christian radio.

What other secular songs need to be covered by Christian bands?

I’ve lost some weight recently and, until now, haven’t really discussed it that much. There may be two people in my life who know where I began and where I ultimately want to end. Losing weight is somewhat embarrassing because it obviously means there was weight to lose in the first place. And, up until now, I was a little uncomfortable sharing how much weight I have to lose. It’s my hope, though, that my openness and transparency about my weight loss will inspire me to maintain my focus and hit my goal.

I began counting my calories with the LiveStrong application on my iPhone in the middle of December. When I began counting calories I weighed 205.5 pounds with a BMI of 32.2, which placed me in the obese category. Because I counted calories over the holidays, I was able to maintain that weight and on January 2, 2010, I again weighed 205.5 pounds. In the 15 weeks since then, I have lost 27 pounds and now weigh 178.5 pounds with a BMI of 28; according to my BMI, I am now only overweight.

My ultimate goal is to lose 50 pounds and weigh around 155 pounds. In future posts, either on Topical Tuesdays or Freeform Fridays, I’ll share my plan, my motives and some of my experiences. For now, though, I just wanted to be a little more transparent and lose the stigma and embarrassment of having 50 pounds to lose. And now I’ve added the people who read my blog to the ranks of those who can hold me accountable; it’s probably only four people, but it’s four more than I had before.

If I’m at church then God is really going to speak to me.

If I’m at a retreat in the mountains then God is going to have plenty to say.

If I’m at a conference then God is really going to communicate his truth through the speakers onstage.

If I’m at the beach then God is going to whisper something into my heart as I watch the sunset.

Those are all great places for God to speak to me. If I think that God will only speak to me in those situations, though, then I am putting him in a box. And God doesn’t fit in a box, even if it’s a really big box.

God has been showing me that he can speak to me whenever he wants. Lately that has meant the Holy Spirit speaking to me and giving me insight while I’m in the shower. I don’t know what it is about the shower or why it’s a good place for God to speak to me. Recently, though, he has regularly used those ten minutes of shampooing, washing and shaving to give me insight into issues I’m facing or sermons I’m preparing.

I would have never guessed that God would use my daily shower as a place of revelation, which is probably why he does use it. Not only is he speaking to me but he’s also showing me that nobody puts God in a box, just like nobody puts baby in a corner.

What unexpected places has God spoken to you?

One of my seminary professors told me that we shouldn’t focus on ourselves during our sermons, that we shouldn’t use our own lives as an example. Recently I’ve been ignoring that advice; I have been sharing applicable stories from my own life. I appreciate openness and honesty, especially from the pulpit; it makes the preacher seem much more authentic and the lessons taught much more practical.

As a preacher and a leader I need to embrace openness and honesty. Obviously there is a balance between authenticity and giving out too much information, but I would much rather struggle with those questions than whether or not to open up at all. When we’re open and honest over a period of time, people recognize that and are more willing to allow us to speak truth into their lives. Openness and honesty lay the foundation that really allows us to build into people.

How has the openness and authenticity of another impacted your development?

“Gaston” – Beauty and the Beast
When I first saw Beauty and the Beast I probably didn’t like Gaston very much. He was wicked, he was evil and he wanted to kill the Beast. As I’ve gotten older, though, I’ve realized I like Gaston more and more with each passing year. He really is a man’s man and I’m thinking about following in his footsteps by eating five dozen eggs every morning to help me get large.

“The Circle of Life” – The Lion King
The first cassette tape I ever bought was the soundtrack to The Lion King. I remember cleaning my room and singing songs like “I Just Can’t Wait to Be King” and “Hakuna Matata” at the top of my lungs. I always liked “The Circle of Life” when I was growing up, but my interest in the song is growing as my wedding draws nearer. Eventually I am going to have kids and, when my first born is dedicated, I want to play “The Circle of Life” and thrust my child in the air like Simba.

“I’ll Make a Man Out of You” – Mulan
I don’t really have strong feelings for Donny Osmond either way, but I feel inspired when he tells me that I should be as swift as the coursing river. Honestly, I’m not much of a man; I don’t know much about cars or tools and I like Celine Dion way too much. But when I listen to “I’ll Make a Man Out of You,” I have hope that I can have all the strength of the raging fire and be as mysterious as the dark side of the moon.

What are some of your favorite Disney songs?

When I was living with my parents, Target trips were like going to Disneyland. I would go to Target because I needed pens or contact lens solution, but I knew in the back of my mind I would walk out with much more than those needed items. Every time I went to Target I would get what I needed and then head to the electronics section. There was never a trip to Target when I didn’t walk out with a new CD, DVD, video game or toy. Those were the days.

Now when I go to Target and spend $100 it’s on boring items: laundry detergent, trash bags, deodorant, hand soap. Target used to be so much fun but that entertaining sheen has worn off. I still like Target, but now it’s like eating my vegetables: I know it’s good for me, but it’s just not that much fun.

What’s your favorite part about Target?